A not open scene of the No Laughing EDF.
[hide:orby9aao]本邦初公開 笑ってはいけない地球防衛軍24時
宇宙人生体実験映像～!!（ヘイポー星人生態実験映像）
[img:orby9aao]http://i.imgur.com/tieTjce.jpg[/img:orby9aao]
[attachment=0:orby9aao]Gaki_140112_#1187_Alien Heipo.zip[/attachment:orby9aao][/hide:orby9aao]
As explained in the episode itself, this was originally filmed as a segment for No Laughing, but it was so entertaining they saved it for an actual episode.
[hide:1zueehld]And just like Matsumoto commented, that certainly wasn't something to watch with your family on new year's.[/hide:1zueehld]
Partial translation for first few mins only(because I grew tired of Heipo lol). I did this as part of a personal exercise in Japanese. I’ll try the rest of the episode perhaps in May or June.
I put question marks where I am not sure who the person talking is or what they are saying.
[hide:3b9276p6]-Legend-
M: Downtown-Matsumoto
H: Downtown-Hamada
T: Cocorico-Tanaka
E: Cocorico-Endo
Y: Tsukitei Hosei
F: License-Fujiwara
I: License-Inomoto
Hei: Heipo
N: Narrator
GDFE: Gaasuu Kurobikari Defense Force of Earth
-START-
I: 1st Gaki no Tsukai ya arahende
I: First airing - No-laughing Defense Force of Earth 24 hours
I: Alien lifeform Experiment Footage~!!
?: What is it?
?: What is it?
?: I don't know.
M:?
I:?
I:?
Words on screen: Today's project: Unshown footage that was
recorded for GDFE 24Hrs but was not used
I: There exist footage which had not been shown for last year's New Year special
M: It's just trash footage right?
M:?
F: No, no.
F: Even though it's 'special footage', it wasn't shown, unfortunately.
Y: That means we have not yet seen it?
I: That's right
M: If it's really interesting, it should have been shown
H: Yeah, that's right
F: This footage is quite special and funny, but we weren't able to show this
F: Footage of an experiment on an alien from Heipo
?: Heipo alien?
Y: Sounds interesting
M: Speaking of him, We haven't seen him backstage today
Y: Honestly, this sounds interesting!!
M: Is it ok?
H: I wonder…How scary
M: We just need to watch a video, right?
I: But it really is quite interesting and funny
M: You keep saying 'interesting', 'interesting'…
Others: Yeah…
I: It's ok if you expect a high standard
E: Eh, really?
Others: Eh?
F:It's really ok.
F: Because it's 'special footage'
H: We got trapped huh?
***sore wa mou hameraretanaa
01:43
I: VTR, please.
Words on screen: Caught an alien who has intruded Earth
N: Our Gaasuu Defense Force of Earth has succeeded in catching an alien intruder
Words on screen: To investigate this organism, an experiment was carried out
N: To investigate this organism, an experiment was carried out
Words on screen: This is from start to end, valuable footage
Words on screen(small): Narrator: Yamada Shinichi
N: This is from start to end, valuable footage
Hei: Ah, ah, what are you doing!?
Hei: Eh, eh
Scientists: (in English) Calm down! Calm down!
Hei: eh, where are we going? No~
Words on screen: Gaasuu DFE Experiment Room
Hei: What are you doing? Eh?
Scientists: (in english) Don't move, don't move
Words on screen: Mystery alien, Heipo alien
Scientists: (in English) Don't move, don't move. Stop there. You understand?
Hei: (in English) understand. Sit?
Scientists: (in English) Wait. Wait there
M: Ah, this…Heipo is weak to this
Hei:vWhat is this? Ueh~
Hei: What is this?
Hei: eh, scary, eh
Hei: uwa…I'm really in a different room
Hei: No wayy
E:"really in a different room"
H: What the heck is he saying?
Hei: eh, what should I do?
Words on screen:
Content of Experiment
Using night vision cameras in the totally darkened room,
observe Heipo alien,
and record his state without setting any tricks or traps
N: The experiment that will be carried out will be:
N: turning off all lights in the room, using night vision cameras
N: with no other traps,
N: in order to observe Heipo alien alone in his natural state
02:59
Hei: Why? Ahh, no~
Hei: aaaaaAAAA!!
Hei: Hey!!
Words on screen: time till it becomes dark
(countdown from 5)
Words on screen(top right): Observing via infrared camera
Hei: Let me out!
H: That's no good…making it dark
H: Something terrible will happen
***erai koto ni naru yo
Hei: yelling
Hei: I can't see! Scary! No good! I can't see anything
M: The eyes just have to get used to it
M: Is he a child?
Hei: I can't see anything
Hei: Wah…something's there!!
Hei: I don't know! I don't know!
Hei: Ehh…Naka(director), let me out~!
Hei: Stop this~ please!
Hei: Scary…I don't know where the exit is
Hei: I'm no good at this kind of stuff
Hei: Really!
Hei: I said, Stop this starts coughing
03:52
H: Acting, he's acting
E: Right? It's easy to see through, right?
Hei: I'm in poor condition today
Hei: I don't knooooooOOOW aaahh
Hei: Did something just move?
Hei: My chest's starting to hurt
Hei: Just open the door…aaaaAAAH!
M: How noisy
Words on screen: Heipo alien, surprised by the touch of his antenna
M: Nothing has been done to him yet!
?:?
M:?
Hei: Hey, it's totally black and I can't see anything
M: We know that
Hei: There's nothing in front of my eyes, really total darkness
Hei: aah aahh Not sure if there's nothing there…I don't know
Hei: Isn't it about time…
Hei: to switch on (the lights)…hey
Hei: I have a fever, a fever…it will flare again
Hei: Because it's total darkness, I can't see anything
04:56
Hei: Ah! Eh? There's a sound
Hei: No good…
Hei: What are you planning on doing? Hurry and let me out
Hei: Scary…scary…Scary~ Enough alREADY
Hei: Uwa! Ahh! Uwaaa!!
Hei: Why is this (antenna) so long!!
Hei: Ah ahh! What what what!?
Hei: Who? Eh eh
E: There's nothing, just the lights switched off
H: It's just darkness
E: It's just darkness
Hei: I'll really become strange, in this darkness
Hei: My mind is becoming strange ahh
M: How many times is he going to reach such a peak?
Hei: who? who? WHo? WHO? WHO?
05:53
Hei: Please, turn the lights on, please
Hei: I can't see
Hei: I'm going to cry already
Hei: Eh? What? Where am I?
Hei: I don't know. where is this?
Hei: Eh? Eh? What's this?
M: ?
T: He always leaves the lights on
Y: He becomes like this at home if it turns dark?
E: Seems so
Hei: eh? it became dark again!
Hei: What's this? Eh? Where is this? Who?
Hei: Eh? I don't know
Hei: Eh? Where the heck am I…
Hei: Where is this place? Eh?
Hei: Eh? Where am I? Where am I!
M: The volume of his voice is quite impressive
Hei: EH! AAHH! HERE!!
Hei: Am I closer to the door?
Hei: Just let me out already enough
M: Slowly, his ???
Hei: I'm bad at this…I'm begging
Hei: I'm pleading here, in total darkness
06:51
M: He's slowing becoming a prisoner
Words on screen: 10 minutes since the start
Hei: Why do I have to be here for so long? aaaAAAH
Hei: I don't know
M: ??
Hei: Ueeeh!? No!
H: What's happened?
Hei: No! It's enough, just stop this!
Hei: It's way too dark here!! Stop joking around!!
M: "It's way too dark here"
Hei: Uwa! Hey!
Hei: Someone, come here already!
Hei: I'm begging! I don't know what's going on already!
Hei: Please! uwaa!
Hei: Please. Please stop. Please. I can't stand this anymore…
Hei: Ah ah ah!!
Hei: I don't know, I can't see anything
Hei: Didn't I plead with you already? Enough
Hei: It's enough, at this stage
07:52
Hei: It's dark and scary…
M: ? setsumei?
H: Yeah
E:Yeah
Hei: Enough, please
Hei: I already asked to stop with such a plan
Hei: I don't know what you want to do…
Hei: Aah!
Hei: No! Eeh!?
Hei: Switch on the lights I can't see anything
Hei: NooooOOOOO
Hei: I can't do this anymore…
M: This would be good even With just the sound on an iPod
M: Maybe I should put it in my iPod later?
Hei: It's too scary I can't move…
Hei: Please! Really, please!
Hei: Isn't this enough!
Hei: to end this here! It's scary!
Hei: Scary scary scary scary…
Hei: Sca~ary!!
Hei: Aah! Who?
Hei: Is someone there?
08:53
M:?
***hasande ki yo ru na
Hei: I told Uchino(desk) today
Hei: that I have a fever and wanted to go to the doctor's
H/M: Here it appears
E: this pattern
H: Yeah
Hei: I was serious
Hei: I have a fever! This is strange!
Hei: Say so too, Uchino! To the director!
Hei: Didn't I say earlier!
Hei: I'm sorry this is scary…
09:24
Words on screen: There was such a conversation with Uchino
before the experiment
Words on screen(top right): Filmed in changing room with
hidden camera
Narration: There was such a conversation with Uchino
before the experiment in the changing room.[/hide:3b9276p6]
Matsumoto wearing the jacket Yamasaki got him!
I want to see this subbed, really like heipo’s episodes.